freefall

It's like bungy jumping, that moment when you're all geared up, standing on the ledge. 

There's lotsa things I want to write about, revelations and stories and truths I've found revealed. But what I'm gonna share today is this verse. I subscribe to these daily devotions from Max Lucado, incepts from his books. They're about grace. Sometimes I skim them and sometimes I take every word in. And this verse has really sunk in:

 2 Peter 3:18 

 “Grow in the grace and knowledge of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ.” 

Max was sayin' how God gives us grace always, always, no matter what -- an extravagent kind of grace. And how  often do we offer grace? The kind of grace that makes people go, "Mate, are you serious?" 

The kind of grace where we're not gettin' anything in return. The kind of grace where it just so happens that this person has taken something that meant a lot to us and we say, you know what? Take it. I forgive you. The kind of grace where we hold no grudges and we say, "I understand." The kind of grace that it might hurt something in you to give because you were holdin' on to it. Because they don't deserve it.

Like me. I take what I want and God, what's He do? He showers me in a bucket of grace, that's what. He loves me for absolutely nothing. For less than nothing, actually -- He loves me after I stuff even the simple stuff up and refuse to do what He says because I'm too scared and afraid and timid. He goes, "It's okay, Em. Don't worry about it. Let's keep going." He forgives me and He takes my hand. 

why am i so afraid to fall 

free fall 

maybe it's because i don't really believe

that anyone could really hold me

while i'm fallin' 

That was my fear. It was, you know. It's like bungy jumping, that moment when you're all geared up, standing on the ledge. You look down. The water is so far away. They tell you to smile and wave at the camera. You try and force a smile but when you get the photo back, you know fear will be written all of your face. It's not the kind of fear you can mask. You're shaking. You're thinking, "Why am I here? Why on earth did I think this would be cool? Fun? Perfectly doable?"

"3...2...1..." The official guy is counting down. You're shaking your head. No way. 

And then just when you've decided to give up, he pushes you. You grab hold of your nose like you're afraid of swallowing water. And you're fallin'. You're fallin' free fall. 

"Whaaaaatt?" "God! God! oh God!" Your tummies flopping about every which way. You're spinning. Swinging. Falling.

I can do anything through Christ who gives me strength. 

You cling to those words. And you realize you're doing it. You let go of your nose and your arms spread out wide, embracing Truth. 

I, the Lord your God, will hold your right hand,

Saying to you, ‘Fear not, I will help you.’

ISAIAH 41:13

I wrote a song the other day. I'd like to post it. Because it contains Truth that opened my eyes.